The Plague…..

Women have mostly cozied up to me to find out  my most intimate secrets or to explore the manner in which I operate. Rarely, do I find true friendship and camaraderie with other women. It always seems that they are forever in competition mode.

My gramps always told me, “Have many a friend and treat them well,but never to them your secrets tell, because when your friends become your foes, all over the world your secrets go.”

Can I tell you? Truer words have never been spoken. Each and every time something low down and dirty transpires in my life. I only have to look within my small circle of “so called friends”.

I have felt the cold, frosty venom of women at social events. I am never quite sure why they react to me in the way that they do, however I do know that their notions are misguided. I attend in good spirits, bearing goodwill, and each and every time, I am met with ghastly, evil stares as if they think I have come with a padded wagon to take all their men home with me. Oftentimes, I try reaching out to other women, just to be civil, and it seems as if they get a sick, sense of satisfaction by being rude or non-compliant.

Therefore, I have stopped reaching out. I am not desperate or hungry for friendship. So, if someone finds it too painful to be civil or sociable to me, I feel it is their loss, because I am an awesome and great person.

I have never been  a serial killer, I don’t have any skeletons fighting to get out my closets, therefore I am a feather in their cap. It should be a honor and privilege when I reach out to anyone, because that is not an event that occurs often.

Most of my “so called girlfriends” liked to hang around me because I was usually in tune with fashion, make-up and the social scene. I was not a party maven, but I often received invitations to some of the most happening events in the city. My circle of acquaintances were extensive, and they knew that at any given time, through me, they could get connected to very eligible bachelors.

Once these connections were established, the friendships slowly dwindled away. There were women I had known since childhood, that I was sure, that I would be in their weddings, however, that was not the situation.

They would not speak to me for years on end, and as soon as they were about to approach the altar, they would send me a matter-of-fact invitation, as if I am supposed to drop everything to see them preen for a day. Because that is usually the motive behind the invitations. How can you not call, write or visit a person in years and then expect them to attend your wedding? Especially one that you were responsible for from the beginning. These women had the audacity to act as if everything is A-OK. That is just distasteful and wrong.

In such matters, all etiquette gets tossed out the window as far as I am concerned. I usually choose to be classic ME in circumstances like this. I become Ms. Persnickety which often irritates them to the core.

I often decline with a zinger of a remark, because I want them to know that I am upset and hurt because they misused my friendship and hospitality.

In my rule book, no one gets to use me and prance around as if every thing is honky-dory.

Most women can’t stand it if you take care of yourself and make a decent presentation. They spend most of their lives trying to even the score. If it means they never catch up until their wedding days, then so be it. But, they are going to milk that day for all it is worth, and have fun socking it to you anyway they can.

I choose not to play their sordid, sadistic little mind games. In my world, real friends cherish each other at all times, and even when circumstances have you apart from one another, the inclusiveness is always there. You do not ignore someone for years and then as soon as you are getting hitched you send them an invitation. The gesture will definitely be perceived as (a). you wanting a gift desperately or (b). you are trying to rub salt in their wounds.

It sort of like “Na-na-na-na! You thought you were all that and a bag of chips, but look at me, I beat you to the finish line!”

In my opinion, this is classless and too crummy for words.