End of Relationship Stigma

Why is breaking up so hard to do? If you think about it, either person is actually doing the other a favor by keeping things real, if they are not “feeling” the love vibes.

Despite most couples’ efforts to break things off amicably and in good taste, there is always that one partner who takes the act of breaking up to a whole new tacky level.

Some men and women choose to end relationships by flaunting another love interest in plain sight. While others prefer to drop the bomb by displaying their unfaithfulness through strategically leaving reminders of their dangerous liaisons. Then, there are the cowards who just transform into ghosts, exiting by “ghosting”.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the term “ghosting”, it means to leave without a trace or reason. When men or women participate in this act, there is never any closure and if you are a self respecting human being; you will refrain from even trying to contact the person or to discover why.

If he or she was BOLD enough to leave you hanging. Then, be BOLD enough to forget him/her. The difference between someone cheating or being blatantly deceptive is, at least, you know that the relationship is on a downward spiral.

But, when a mate chooses to leave without an explanation it has the potential to rock one’s world…And not in a good way. If there was ever a time a guy or woman should lie, it is when he/she wants to leave. It at least allows the next person to hold on to their dignity never questioning or second guessing.

Even in a lie, the actions are clear and concise. Many folks will say, “Well, it doesn’t matter what transpires, you are well rid of the jerk….”

If only life were so simple. You see, when a person chooses to disrespect you in any manner in a relationship, word gets around. If you do not handle the matter appropriately you will be perceived as a punk or worse, “The World’s Biggest Loser!”

When a man or woman jilts another by dropping him/her like a hot potato or ghosting, it transcends a message that he/she cannot be any good. It is as if they are valueless, unworthy of an explanation.

Suddenly, all interactions are judged by that one incident. Everyone, including peers, your family and friends will think you are easy fodder to be disrespected or treated like a no count. Why…? Because that is the way society is.

You can try to rewrite history by buying into their theory of, ” The only way to get over a person is by getting under another one”. The truth is, the relationship grapevine travels faster than the speed of light.

Even if he/she is a cyclops, he/she would have heard about the jilting and guess what…?He/she will pull the same decrepit behavior, because he/she thinks it is acceptable.

Personally, I believe, why most men and women jilt and ghost, is because they want to be begged and fawned over. In which case, I am not the woman for the job. I have no time to deal with grown individuals who cannot just communicate effectively.

I am not going to indulge in juvenile games just to give anyone an adrenaline rush at my expense. Many women, once dumped will cry, whine and follow the men around like puppy dogs wanting to know why or trying to negotiate. Not me.

If a mate believes my moon will stop shining because he leaves, then he is truly living in a fool’s paradise and may be diagnosed as DELUSIONAL!

There have been folks who “ghosted” out of my life without a cause or explanation.  I refuse to let their actions define me; or, for society to label me “No Good” because they were not proper and decent.

It is the “ghosters” who should be shunned. When I reminisce on my life, it is evident, I am a stand-up kind a girl who gets into relationships for the long haul.

My thoughts on ghosting are….If someone wants to leave for no reason and does not provide an explanation. Forget him/her like a bad habit. Disregard what others may think of you for not following them up on their petty nonsense. Just be still and maintain your stance. When the time is right, the appropriate individual will arrive, sticking to your side as if he/she were glue. Even if he/she never arrives, you will still be okay, because self love is more important than perpetuating illusions.