Most sensitive women love with their hearts and souls, so when relationships end we are often devastated. Unlike men, it takes us quite some time to move on because we suspect we have been replaced by someone more beautiful, more exciting…Someone better.
All those feelings tend to hack away at our self confidence and self esteem. Even if some of us are drop dead gorgeous, or smart as a fox, none of those things matter because all we are able to focus on is the loss.
I bet plenty of women wonder what happens to their exes when they move on to greener pastures……Well, believe it or not, karma usually catches up with them. Here is my story about one of my exes.
There is always that one relationship that you have high hopes it will definitely work out. Then all of a sudden like a broken record the rug gets pulled from underneath you. In the moment you are in shock, grief and disbelief, because you made sure you covered all your bases. You paid attention to every minute detail and played the part of an adoring girlfriend, then you are left wondering, “What the fudge happened?”
That was basically my story. But I was not in La-La- Land alone. You see my boyfriend kept telling me how wonderful I was till the bitter end, so like a P45 (pink slip) I never saw the end coming.
I may have felt some weirdness in the atmosphere, but as far as I was concerned when it comes to male-female relationships until you have an iron-clad commitment things are generally weird for the most part.
Surprisingly I took my kick to the curb like a champion. However, there was a part of me still wondering. Since I knew the person I was dealing with quite well I knew he was the type that could not go without companionship for long periods of time.
So my next train of thought was, “Who was the hussy that had lured him way?”
The more I stewed on the whole sordid detail I realized no one can really lure anyone away. The person is basically a willing participant and an “open” vessel when he/she chooses to abscond.
Despite my attempts to move on with my life, my girlie nature had me surmising. By the time I was done I thought, “That’s it! She is probably ten times better than I am.” Therefore, I figured, she looked like Jessica Rabbit.
I was even more upset that my beau had been taken over by Jessica Rabbit, who could compete with that? As my mind became more imaginative I figured he was living the Walt Disney life.
I was certain his life was just a dream, now that he had found “The One”. Then reality stepped in. Sometimes you gotta love how small the world is.
My reality jolt which helped me put my life in perspective and maintain my title as “A hell of a catch” occurred when I ran into some old friends. They had no idea that this person and I were involved, but they certainly went on and on about their old friend who had ditched his long time girlfriend for a singer.
He had thought he had found a gold mine in her and was sure, together they would own the city. With him being her svengali and her “undeniable” talent, how could they lose? The friends even expressed how he was so glad to get rid of the other one, “the psycho babe” (aka me) to be with a more “normal,” well rounded individual.
He felt he was home free. No more drama, or playing entertainment director. It was going to be a cool, artsy life for him.
In defense of myself, the one he called “psycho”, I felt he was basing that label on one moment I felt disrespected in the relationship. He gave me cause to believe he was cheating. He denied all the evidence I found. But, oddly enough months later there we were saying “Arriverderci!”
So as I reflected, I realized I had missed my cue to call him, “Liar, liar pants on fire!”
Anyway, guess what happened?
The woman he left me for turned out to be a hoax. She couldn’t even sing if her life depended on it. Sure, she had paraded CDS which made it appear as if she had real talent and was well sought after, but any good audio engineer could make even my morning crooning sound fantastic.
Okay, by now you are probably feeling as elated as I did at the time, but that is not even the best part. He thought I was drama because of my accident, and going through therapy and occasionally leaning on him for moral support. After all, isn’t that what beaus are supposed to do?
Well. like Granny often said, “God does not like ugly!”
His Goddess on the Mountaintop began warping into a nut job. Perhaps it was because he started treating her “differently” once he realized she was a fake and could not bring anything to the table. Perhaps he was experiencing break-up remorse?
It is a hurtful thing when you run to the green pastures thinking there is gold in dem dere hills, not realizing you may have discarded a winning lottery ticket. Tsk! Tsk! (LOL)
The Goddess turned into a bona fide stalker, psycho person. She was showing up at his job unannounced, lurking in his bushes at home. One time she even popped out of his closet while he was entertaining.
If that was not sufficient evidence that he had erred terribly; one evening while he was preparing to go to his family’s home for the holidays she called him shrieking she was going to kill herself.
Apparently he was trying to phase himself out of the relationship, but she was not having any of his indifference. So Goddess decided to unleash some #Drama of her own.
Well, according to sources, her ploy did work for a time. He managed to stay with her long past his disinterest, but then her brand of crazy just became a bit too much. It seemed that since she had found a way to manipulate him, she figured going full on nut job was the way to go.
He would spend the next few years being hauled back and forth to drug rehabilitation centers and mental health wards because Goddess felt that was her hook. Except she did not know him like I did.
Once the theatrics got a bit much, he put on his DGAF cape and hightailed it out of dodge without a forwarding address. Ain’t love grand?
In one afternoon I got quite the earful and came right up to speed with the greener pastures I could not compete with. In those moments I considered myself lucky and a cunning fox.
I could have reasoned with him to stay in the relationship, but there was a more mature side of me that just said….”Spread your tiny wings and fly away!”
Looking back, it was the most cunning move I made because look what happened to Goddess.
It just made me realize how powerful prayer really is. I asked God to look out for me, and without my knowledge he protected me from an opportunist and somebody who had no heart at all.
Fighting For My Life Memoir 