The British Snub

I am the sort of person that once I decide someone is kosher I do not have a problem sharing my family and life with the individual. However, testing people has proven that they will show you the side of themselves they want you to believe in.

Once you get to know them in-depth you realize that even the greatest people can be the biggest riff-raff. When my sisters came into my life I was willing to accept them lock, stock, and barrel.

I did not think of them as half or stepsisters, to me, they were just family. Naturally, I felt my family was theirs and I had hoped they felt generous enough to include me in their family structure.

Upon meeting my step-grandmother and her husband, I was given the impression they were thrilled to meet me. They pretended they were over the moon that my sister had a sister.

However, they always made it clear that my youngest sister was off-limits since she was adopted. Therefore, I was often guarded with my interactions with my younger sister since they had complete control over her.

Over the years, when my biological father and stepmother had arguments, during these disagreements I was used as the whipping post to get back at my father.

My stepgrandmother would say things like “Why don’t you get your daughter married off and stop chastising my granddaughter.”

If my biological father and stepmother were enduring a bad patch in their marriage my stepgrandmother would be nasty to me. When I called to say hello, she would say things like, “You are only related to my granddaughter and I don’t really like you barraging my phone with calls.”

Hence the conversational ambush by my father demanding me not to call the home of my step-grandparents because he was informed I was harassing them.

Naturally, I was mortified about the developments because I thought we had an amicable relationship. For Christ’s sake, I had spent time at their home with them in Richmond and in Jamaica.

I pondered about the accusation of “barragement”. What was considered “barraging them with calls?” Phoning every once in a while to be cordial and to inquire about my sister? My sister was living with them at the time.

As I have stated on several occasions, I am not one of those persons who makes much of people’s shortcomings. Although I was hurt regarding the mean way my step-grandmother treated me at times I still held fond feelings towards her.

The funny thing is I never discussed my personal life with my stepmother, her mother, or even my father. So, when I began hearing stories that my stepgrandmother went around telling people I was sex-hungry, a scammer, a slag, and an evil person I wondered where she was getting her information.

I have never engaged in any clandestine affairs for money nor  have I ever been at the center of any lewd or lascivious conduct.

After thorough research and hiring a private investigator I found out they were spying on me. They would only use the superficial information found to discredit me in my father’s eyes.

I was only guilty of doing what every normal twenty-something woman did. I dated aggressively in my late twenties because I did not date in my teens.

It was suggested I was a whore for living with a guy out of wedlock, and when I had called my father late one night because someone poisoned my drink, well the matter was used to confirm my whorish ways.

The truth was I was working as a Publicist and felt comfortable enough ordering a fruity drink at the venue because my cousin’s cousin was the manager of the bar.

While I waited to interview a notable musician I ordered a drink that would eventually prove almost fatal.

My misadventures as a young woman gave my stepfamily information to be used against me unfavorably. The stories they acquired through frenemies and pseudo-acquaintances were further used to sully my character.

In recent years, I have been privy to my sisters living out of wedlock with men, dating around just as vigorously as I have and my middle sister marries as if it is some sort of sport.

My sisters have no qualms posing practically nude for art and when I complimented my father on a picture I thought was tastefully done, my middle sister cursed me out suggesting I was being vindictive.

The fact is that was not the reason she became indignant about the matter. She knew the underhanded things she had plotted with my ex-bestie to hurt me and was embarrassed I had found out that she was not as above reproach as she, my stepmother and step-grandmother wanted everyone to believe.

Having dealt with British relatives all my life I am well aware of their prejudices. In this situation, my step-grandmother and stepmother had biases regarding Jamaican women.

They bought out the stereotypes of what Jamaicans call “Dibby-Dibby gyals”. In those days I embraced the Jamaican culture and was judged as a result.

They assumed I was the typical Jamaican woman. Except they were wrong since my family is considered Euro-Jamaican and Asian. As I mature I have become aware that love is not an excuse for others to use you, disrespect you, or assassinate your reputation.

Over the years I have found out their protestation of me have been nothing but an act to gain material wealth and possessions from my biological father through tainting me as a royal screw-up.

Their deceptions were purely motivated by money as they have also sought to get half of my adoptive parents’ fortune. The hurtful part is they are my sisters and I know for certain that they are ungrateful and covetous individuals.